Part of an Articial by Matt Springer from March 1999 Pop-Culture-Corn

"HEAD!" Al Snow. The name suggests nothing. His gimmick? A styrofoam head wearing a wig that he calls "Head." (If you can't already see where this is going, then you've been in that convent a few decades too long, Sister.)

His finisher involves hitting his opponents with "Head," but in this match he loses to Hardcore Bob Holly, and gets very angry at "Head," hitting her with an aluminum chair. In a dead-on mimic of the classic abusive relationship scenario, Snow then regrets beating "Head," and confesses his love, which she silently doubts.

He says he'll prove his love, leading to the following call and response exchange:

Snow: What do we want?

Crowd: HEAD!

Snow: What do we need?

Crowd: HEAD!

Snow: What do we looooooove?!

Crowd: HEAD!

As if you needed a gimmick to get a mostly-male crowd to start chanting "HEAD." Sheesh.

Part wrestler, part porn star

It's hard not to notice that the sexual politics in the WWF are a bit fucked up--you've got the closeted homosexuality of Goldust and the Blue Meanie, there's the psychotic relationship Al Snow has with "Head," and then there's Val Venis, the wrestler turned porn star.

He saunters to the ring wearing only a towel and does a wild gyrating dance to sexy music, a number that begins with his trademark line: "Hello, ladies..." delivered like a white guy failing at impersonating Barry White.

In another odd burst of homoeroticism, he does a faux lap dance in the face of any guy who he defeats. I guess that's' what he calls a "finisher." I know that it certainly wouldn't come close to finishing me.