|The Ultimate HEAD Case
By Aaron Williams
WWF Magazine November 2000 pages 36-40
Walk into any sanatorium and you're likey to find a lot of crazy individuals.On the top floor you might see people suffering from dementia or depression.The floor below might house schizophrenics or sociopaths.As you make your way deeper into the bowels of the institution,you will notice that the further from the top floor a person resides,the more bizarre their concept of reality is.If you have the courage to reach the basement,you will find the most delirious,the most enigmatic and the most unhinged individuals of all.This is where you'll find Al Snow
For years,sports-entertainment fans have known that Snow marches to the beat of his own drummer,that he plies his craft in a most unsusual manner.He's been cheered and heckled but through it all,fans have respected and appreciated his off-beat personality and athletic prowless
However most World Wrestling Federation Superstars have shown little respect for the crowned prince of Hardcore,constantly belittling his athletic talents while taking advantage of his less-then-stable mental condition.Two of the larger thorns in Snow's side have been Big Boss Man,who cooked Snow's beloved dog Pepper,and Mick Foley,Snow's lifetime nemesis.For now,Boss Man no longer appears to be an issue with Snow.Yet the very mention of Foley's name can send Snow off the deep-end.Now that Foley has control over booking matches,World Wrestling Federation Magazine asked Snow if he thought the new Commissioner might be keeping him down.His response turned into a tirade.
You're asking if he might be keeping me down?Oh,please,Foley has a thing for me,an obsession,a sickness.He's even admitted it.He was several thousand miles away from me,in Disneyland,he hadn't seen me for weeks,and what did he do?He rode a childerns ride with his kids twice so he coud take a picture of one of the little items in the ride because it reminded him of me.He told me that he woke up one night from a dream.His Wife asked him what he was dreaming about and he told her he was dreaming about me.So I believe that Mick Foley's got a lot of problems where I'm concerned.However,I don't have any problems as far as he is concerned.
While there's no question that Snow despises the present Federation Commissioner,his feelings toward his most successful protege Steve Blackman,remins ambiguous and reflect the complex thought proccess of the man.When Snow speaks of Blackman,he sometimes sounds like a proud parent whose son has made good,but at other times he sounds like an annoyed sensei who cannot rid himself of an irritating and helpless disiple.
I'm happy that Steve's become a star.I don't think he has become a bigger star than me.I mean Steve is moving along and much like a proud Eagle watching the fledglings fly from the nest,I'm watching Steve find what little personality he has gained from being with me as he tries to grow that and share it with the audience.It makes me happy.It makes me proud.But let's make no mistake about it,Steve being a bigger star than me....I don't think so.
No,wait a minute.Come to think of it,Steve is like a chronic disease or luggage.It appears that I have Steve Blackman for life.No matter what I do,I can't seem to get rid of Him.He keeps turning up like a bad penny or that sock in the dryer.Why?I don't know.The minute I have gained a little ground from him,I get sucked back in.He's the black hole for charisma if you have any and he gets near you,he just sucks it away.
As any psychiatrist will tell you,trying to figure out what makes Al Snow tick is a futile exercise.Occasionally however he does provide some clues as to why he acts and says what he does.He may claim that his unorthodox manner is the result of being dropped on is head too many times by his mother,but there has to be more to it then that.Although he won't admit it,Snow's schizophrenic ramblings may be rooted in strong feelings of resentment toward those who do not appreciate his talents and creative genius.Whenever one speaks to him,Snow is sure to point out his accomplishments.
Don't ever forget,I put the word"entertainment"in sports-entertainment.What other Superstar has done the same things I've done as far as the unexpected and inexplicable and made them work?I've involed Benjamin Franklin,Abe Lincoln,a Martian and a deer head.I've given Steve Blackman a personality,and made him entertaining.As a matter of fact,I'm thinking of opening up a care center for wayward uperstars and fallen Hollywood stars.Chris Benoit,Dean Malenko,Perry Saturn,they're all in need of a charisma transfusion.If I did it for Blackman,I can do it for them.
According to Snow,he has a lot more to accomplish in the federation.He is not content to rest on his laurels.What ideas may be swirling around in his head is anyone's guess.And for those who think Snow might be slowing down or losing his creative genius,he has issued the following proclamation:
All I can tell you is that if Al Snow is slowing down,it's only because he's a little too heavily medicated right now.All I have to do is stop taking those pills that the doctors gave me,pull off the old stright jacket,kick off the old house slippers,and brother,I'm ready to dance!